Chapter 12

word count  814 words

Jeannie Miller crossed in the middle of the block rather than walking to the intersection. It wasn't like the timid woman to take chances jaywalking, but she wanted to get away, to get away fast. Horns honked in protest blasting the lady in a zig zag, frantic course. Finally lighting on the curb, she had to stop to catch her breath.

When her breathing cleared, she looked around and noted a diner. Without hesitation she walked in. The little restaurant had two patrons at tables in opposite corners. Jeannie chose to sit at the counter.

A waitress appeared out of nowhere.

"What'll ya have?" When she spoke, her dangling earrings jingled with each word. "Do you need a menu?"

"No. Just coffee."

Jeannie settled in and pulled some brochures out of her purse. A business card took flight from the stack. It slid across the counter. The waitress returning with the coffee, saw it and picked the card up. When she handed it back, her eyes caught a glimpse of the name running across it, Associates in Oncology. She laid it in front of Jeannie with a careful motion.

"Oops, you lost this!" She paused as if to say more, but finally left.

Jeannie clutched the card while tears welled and threatened to roll down her cheeks. She was coming from the doctor's office. The visit now haunted her. The darkened room, the ultra sound, lying there waiting and thinking, "Is this what it is like? Is this how it begins?" You come for a normal check up and end up needing special tests because someone saw something on the x-ray? Time stopped, and it all became simple and clear...to live or not to live, lights on, lights off. Nothing else.

Despite all that, she remembered the embarrassment when the technician spied bruises on her arm and breast. Bruises that had nothing to do with illness. Jeannie didn't try to explain, and the girl didn't ask. And then the ultrasound confirmed what the x-ray suggested, a mass in her breast, not a cyst, needing to be investigated. They gave her the business card and brochures and made her first appointment with the doctor. How could she tell Buzz? Would he be angry with her? Blame her? She only wanted to be a good wife. If he pushed her away, rejected her, what would she do?

Suddenly, the coffee made her feel sick. She wanted to go home, needed to get out of here. She motioned to the waitress, scrambling for money in her purse and realizing she used the last of it for her copay. She pulled out plastic, waving the card at the waitress.

Trudy Hunt sighed in frustration. What the hell was that woman in such a hurry about? Then she remembered the oncology thing and a dab of pity rushed through her. The poor lady might have cancer for all she knew.

"Thanks, Hon!" She grabbed the card. When she got it to the register, she ran it through. It was only when she noticed the name on the card, Jeannie Miller, that her heart stopped. That was Buzz's wife's name. He spoke of her once. And she'd seen the woman’s photo in his wallet. Trudy swung around and looked at the lady at the counter. It matched the picture. The woman was Buzz's wife.

Oh my Gawd! I'm cheating with a married man whose wife has cancer! Who does that? Sneaks around with a dying woman's husband?

Mary, the other waitress, appeared. "Trudy, are you all right? You look pale!"

"Here, give this receipt to that lady!" Trudy said. "I think I'm going to be sick!"

She rushed to the restroom to vomit her guts out.

Later, at home, Jeannie sat at the vanity, studying herself in the mirror. She ran a hand along the bruise on her arm, the big black and blue one that looked like Florida. Buzz had done that when she made city chicken for dinner. He hated city chicken. She knew that. He'd told her how his mother always made it to punish him. And yet, still she bought it at the store and served it to him anyway. It was on special, but still. Inconsiderate woman! Okay, so he had a temper, he was so mad he'd grabbed at her arm and shook her for a minute. She wished he didn't, but she didn't blame him. She always did something wrong. He was a hard worker and devoted to his job. She should be supporting him instead of causing him grief. She shouldn't screw around or he'd probably kick her out.

"I can't tell him," she murmured. "I don't want to cause him trouble. I do enough of that already. As long as he thinks I'm fine, I'll have a home. Adam and I will have a home."