Chapter 118

word count 822


When Trudy heard Simone call out out in her sleep to her former lover, Brenda, she lost it. Hurt, anger, and betrayal, all took over at once.

"BRENDA! You said 'Brenda'...Simone, what the hell!"

She issued a sound kick to Simone's cot, rattling the old contraption, making it vibrate like an earthquake in progress.

"I hate you! I hate you! I HATE YOU!" She kicked the bed twice again and next proceeded to straddle the girl and grab her by the shoulders, shaking her, next pummeling the woman with clenched fists.

Thus rudely awakened, Simone didn't know what to think. Protesting in muttered phrases, she grabbed for Trudy's fists, all the while fighting grogginess and wishing she could slip back to her delicious dream. The contrast between the sweet love she was dreaming and this all out assault boggled her fuzzy mind.

Trudy wasn't satisfied. She didn't hear screams of pain, no cries of apology. Instead, the woman was barely fighting back, sleepy and uncomprehending. And worse, perhaps a bit too happy with her dream. No doubt once Simone woke up, she would downplay it and try to convince her the dream was meaningless. But Trudy knew what she heard, and she knew passionate words when they were uttered. Simone had never spoken that way to her, in sincere unity, like she was overcome by love. Simone's affection had a measured precision about it, never abandonment of sense or emotion. It all brought tears to Trudy's eyes.

"You miserable bitch! All this time ya said ya loved me, but now I find you dreamin' about another woman. If Brenda meant so damn much to ya, then go pleasure yourself while you dream of her. Because ya sure as hell won't be doing anything with me."

Simone pulled back and glared at her opponent. Trudy looked far from beautiful, her hair was in chaos and her face skewed in anger. Gazing at Trudy, she lost her careful reasoning, especially after being startled awake. Her plans to keep herself safe through Trudy's trust demolished into dust. She exploded.

"How dare you! Brenda was the love of my life, the most beautiful creature to walk the planet. And you stand here and compare yourself to her! You are an idiot. You don't have as much brains in your whole head as she had in her little finger. And you're an emotional cripple! You were so easy to manipulate, hungering for love. I had you wrapped around my finger. But I never loved you! I never wanted you. I was just taking pity on you!”

Trudy fell back, devastated, her world falling apart, piece by piece crumbling. If she didn't have Simone, she had no one.

"GUARD! GUARD! Help! I've been assaulted!" Simone banged on the bars.

Trudy couldn't grasp the reality of what was happening. Her head spun, wild and crazy. She thought she was going to faint. Her love, her Simone, hated her, pitied her. And now the woman was screaming for help, help to get away from her. What had she done? Now she was alone.

***

"Detective Miller, are you certain you're being honest with me?"

Mrs. Dunn's eyes locked with his, even from far across the room. They were tiny blue beacons of intelligent perception shooting his way. He paused to think, scramble, while the interlude in time seemed to last forever. Finally, he had to admit the truth. You couldn't fool Mrs. Dunn for very long. He knew that.

"No. I'm not being honest. I'm not innocent. I'm sorry, Mrs. Dunn. I'm just so ashamed of what I did. At the time when Tobin said I beat him, I wasn't in my right mind. I was ambitious, working day and night, popping pills to keep up the momentum, to bring in more scuzz balls than anyone in the precinct. Tobin gave me a good chase. It was intense. When I finally cornered him, he threw down his gun and put his hands up. He did it right away. But I didn't care. I was worked up, angry. He'd had me running for blocks, threatened me with his gun. I'm ashamed to say I charged in and pounded on him without a second thought, beating him. My backup arrived and pulled me off. That cop has since died, so now only Tobin and I know what I did, a senseless beating on a perp who didn't deserve it...and now you know, too."

"Your secret is safe with me," said Mrs. Dunn, her eyes glimmering. "And your own conscious is punishing you enough. No need for me to say anything. But I'm glad you shared your pain with me. I'd like to help."

"You're right. It happened ten years ago, but in my mind it was like yesterday. I think of it every day...with regret, shame, all of that. You're a good friend, Mrs. Dunn."