chapter 101

word count: 1620

buzz entered the 45^th st precinct through the squad room.. he had decided against going directly in the detention entrance as he was unsure what kind of mood trudy would be in after having been dragged out of his foyer kicking and screaming just a few hours earlier.. 

she was a little firecracker, of that he could be sure,, and he wanted to check with the uniforms that brought her as to her state of mind before he went to see her.. there had been enough controversy surrounding his relationship with her already,, and he really wasn’t ready to add any fuel to the fire.. 

he spotted the arresting officers huddled over a desk in a cubicle on the far side of the room,, evidently completing the paperwork on trudy’s most recent arrest.. how many times was it now that he had rescued her from the bowels of the department of corrections?? two?? three?? truth be told he had lost count.. if this didn’t stop he was destined to become the laughing stock of the department, if he wasn’t already.. 

as buzz threaded his way thru the cramped squad room,, filled with the usual suspects,, hookers, addicts, and small time gangbangers all doing their best to impress the desk jockey cops of their innocence,, he heard his name being called out above the din..

“detective miller!!”

buzz turned to see the one of the department sketch artists flagging him down from across the room.. heading in that direction,, buzz called out, “what can i do for you?”

“i think i’ve  got something here you ought to see.” replied the sketch artist who was seated at a desk with two very flamboyantly dressed, unmistakably gay men.

‘what on earth?’ buzz thought to himself as he approached the trio,, seeing as how he was still on an extended leave of absence he couldn’t imagine what the hell the sketch artist could possibly be working on that would be of any interest to him.. 

“what cha got?” buzz asked shortly.

“i think you better have a look at this composite.” the artist said as she stood up and made room for buzz to slip in behind the desk and have a closer look at the computer screen..

“there was a brawl at the pink lady tonight,, and these gentlemen were kind enough to come in and give us a detailed description of the…”

“holy shit!” buzz exclaimed as his eyes fell upon the unmistakable likeness of none other than trudy hunt..

“it’s trudy!!” 

“oh, then you know him?” simon couldn’t help but chime in,, anxious to get a chance to make conversation with the fine specimen of a man that stood before him gaping at the composite on the computer screen.

“him??” buzz asked,, somewhat taken aback.

“let me see if i can explain,” the sketch artist broke in, “it seems as though your friend here found her way into the pink lady tonight,, and in the words of these two gentleman,, correct me here if i am wrong guys,, was ‘simply too magnificent’ to have been a woman.. and it seems..”

“oh my!!” michael cut her off mid-sentence. “you mean he is a she?? what on earth?? my gaydar was seriously off the charts!!”

“i’m with you girl,” simon consoled a visibly shaken michael with a comforting arm around his shoulders.

“you could knock me over with a feather right now.. i would have bet my sweet ass…” his voice trailed off as the two huddled together and engaged in a more or less private conversation as buzz addressed the sketch artist.. 

“i’m gonna need a print out of this.” buzz informed the artist, who in turn printed the composite and handed it to him.. 

as he all but snatched it out of her hand buzz said, “can we keep a lid on this for a minute while i find out what the hell is going on?” 

“sure. i can hold on to it till i hear back from you.”

“who caught the case?” a bewildered buzz asked, as he tried to wrap his mind around the fact that his trudy had somehow or another been mistaken for a guy in drag.

“let me see,”  responded the sketch artist as she shuffled through the paperwork looking for the name of the officer assigned to the case.. 

“maulkin, officer kevin maulkin.”

“maulkin? don’t think i know him. any idea where i can find him??”

“he’s right over there, third cubicle from the right, the big guy with the sandy hair.” said the sketch artist, as she pointed across the squad room.

“i think he is doing the paperwork on it right now.. he would be able to fill you in on all the sordid details.”

“right.” buzz responded hazily, as he set off across the squad room toward officer maulkin,, still trying to drink it all in.. 

“buzz!! what the hell are you doing here?” a familiar voice called out after him.. he turned to see both hank bowers and gill bettencourt exiting the elevator.

“what gives, buddy?” hank queried as he extended his hand in greeting. a still reeling buzz shook his hand tentatively,, not at all the firm handshake hank had come to expect from buzz at all.. 

“you don’t look so good.” gil remarked in a genuine tone of concern. “maybe we ought a sit down.”

“whew!” buzz exhaled audibly as the three of them took a seat along the wall just outside of the elevator.. 

“you’re not going to believe this,” an exasperated  buzz said as he handed the composite over  to hank.

glancing at the composite, gil and hank exclaimed in unison, “it’s trudy!!”

“it sure as hell is.” buzz replied in a somewhat defeated tone.. 

“what the hell? where’d you get this?? trudy is downstairs..” a puzzled hank informed him.

“i know, i know.. she showed up at the house tonight,, all tanked up and got into it with my housekeeper,, who proceeded to call some of the boys over to collect her.”

“ok, so that answers the question, ‘what the hell is she doing here again?’ but it doesn’t explain what’s up with the composite..” gil  said as he leaned in close awaiting an explanation.. 

“i only wish i knew..” buzz stated as he tried to figure out how he was gonna explain trudy's latest escapade to his buddy’s without sounding like a total mad man.. 

“all i know so far is that trudy was involved in an altercation at the pink lady..”

“no fucking way!!” gil exclaimed trying unsuccessfully to hold back his explosive laughter.. 

“you mean to tell me it was trudy?” hank asked as he joined gil in  a gut wrenching laugh.

“you mean you guys already know about this? what the fuck??” a visibly confused buzz looked on in disbelief as the two of them continued to laugh uncontrollably..

“so trudy was the 'guy'!!” gil was able to spit out as he tried to catch his breath and regain some sense of composure.. 

“the 'guy' that went postal on the 'girls' at the pink lady tonight??”

“oh this is one for the books!!” hank squeaked out as he hit gil solidly on the back,, and the two of them burst out in yet another chorus of uproarious laughter.. 

“would somebody please explain to me what the hell is so fucking funny??” buzz barked, eager to get a handle on exactly what was going on.. 

it took a minute,, but both gil and hank eventually quit laughing long enough to explain the hysterical reason behind the little altercation trudy had gotten herself in at the pink lady.. 

buzz hung his head in his hands.. “trudy, trudy, trudy, what the hell am i gonna do with you?” he said as he balled up the composite print out and tossed it into a nearby trash can..  

“and that’s not even the best part!” gil continued. 

“i just caught her and simone in a liplock in the lock up!!”

“simone? how does she figure into all of this?? and what the hell is she doing in the lock up?”

the conversation took on a much more somber tone,, as hank and gil explained the tie in between simone and brenda simmons,, and how hank had rescued gil just in the nick of time earlier this evening at simone's apartment.. 

buzz looked on in disbelief as gil wrapped up the strange chain of events with a blow by blow description of what he had witnessed going on between trudy and simone  in the lock up.. 

“this just blows my mind.” buzz concluded when all was said and done.. “and to think i came in here tonight with every intention of springing  trudy..”

“out of the frying pan and into the fire, buddy. i’m thinking you better leave this one alone..” hank admonished him as he sincerely hoped buzz was thinking  with the head on the top of his neck and not the one in his pants.. 

“i don’t know about you guys,, but i could sure use a drink.” buzz said as he stood up and rolled his head on his shoulders in effort to relive some of the tension of the day.. 

“now you’re talkin’” hank said as both he and gil joined buzz in front of the elevator door..

“i say we stop in over at the pink lady.” gil mused as they stepped onto the elevator, followed closely by simon and michael who instantly broke out in an all too contagious giggle..

“oh please do!! please do!!” chimed simon, as the five of them burst out into a thunderous round of laughter that could be heard long after the elevator began its decent..